I love adult sex shops. I have never been embarrassed by much in my life. In high school, my friends would ask me to go into stores to purchase condoms for them because they had some sort of hang up about strangers knowing they were getting laid. I didn’t mind at all. I mean, soon I had a reputation for getting laid a whole lot more than I actually was. That same devil may care attitude about shopping transferred in adult life to completely not worrying what anyone ever thought about browsing the selections to be found in erotic toy shops.

Adult Sex Shops: Where Great Ideas Are Born (sometimes)

Going shopping in adult toy stores is so much fun. There is so much to see and consider, so many colors and intriguing designs, things to see and touch, the imagination goes wild considering all the potential orgasms just waiting to happen. I love to just walk around the store, chuckling at some of the witty names given to the items (3 Bangs for Your Butt, love that one, the name, I mean, no experience with the toy itself, but who knows, maybe one day. In addition, I enjoy looking at other, more exotic, items and thinking to myself, How the hell do you use that thing?

I love to look at everything, but my purchases are usually pretty much standard fare, vibrators, flavored and warming lubricants, edible undies, edible body paints, stuff like that. My wife is less adventurous than I am, so staying with the basics keeps her happier. I do, however, try to push the limits sometimes, and sometimes the results are better than others are.

When my wife and I visit adult sex shops together, I never get to make wild purchases. She gets all budget conscious and wants to get what we are there for, and experimentation is not really something she wants to splurge on. She knows the things she likes and she is ok with sticking to what she knows works.

When I find myself with an opportunity to go to an adult superstore alone, I sometimes get a little crazy. I usually get a lecture about how I wasted money that should have been spent elsewhere, but by then the new toys have been removed from packaging and are non-refundable. That fact typically earns me an exasperated look and several days’ wait time before getting to try out my prize(s).

Some of the items I purchased in this manner led to memorable successes. The first that comes to mind is a pink G-Spot jelly vibe. That thing produced my first (and hers too!) experience with female ejaculation, so it kind of makes up for failures.

Other purchases were simply a waste of money, because they never got tried. My wife took one look at the stupidly huge vibrating butt plug (it looked so much smaller in the package) and said, ¨If you put that thing anywhere near my ass, I’ll shove it up yours while you sleep! WITHOUT LUBE!¨ I think she meant it, too.

Then, there was the failure to end all failures. Let me do the math for you on this one: One sex swing PLUS one cheaply built apartment ceiling EQUALS a very embarrassed and pissed off wife and a badly aching cock. I mean, dicks are not supposed to bend at that angle.

In any case, trips to adult sex shops can lead to some ideas. They always seem like great ideas at the time, but life, and sex, have a funny way of being, well, funny.